i just hope
that at some point in your life
when the noise finally quiets
when there is no one left to distract you
you close your eyes
and the first thing that rises from the dark
is me
not gently
not sweetly
but suddenly
my face
uninvited
my voice
echoing in a room you thought you emptied
my laugh
the one you once said you liked
now sounding distant
almost unreal
and then
just then
a sigh escapes your lips
not from peace
but from the weight of memory
from the realization
that some things were real
and you let them slip
i hope the mystery of my hand in yours
returns to you
not as comfort
but as a question
the warmth of it
the way our fingers fit
the way you held onto my hips
as if i was something fragile
and necessary
i hope that image wanders in your mind
and refuses to leave
the same way it wandered in mine
for nights that stretched too long
for mornings that felt empty
for days when i replayed
every second
trying to understand
where it broke
i hope one day
you remember
how i looked at you
like you were certainty
how i loved you
without defense
without calculation
and maybe
just maybe
it will hurt
not because you miss me
but because you will finally understand
what you had
and what you let become
a memory
the way it became one for me
too soon
